To win student council, you ultimately need the popular vote from your peers. With a funny introduction, you can get a lot more creative and open as your speech is aimed at teens, not teachers or parents.
Humorous Speech Intros for Each Position
Anecdotes or play on words about the actual job title or things frequently associated with it make great speeches for student council roles. Make sure you understand what student council does so that your speech can be intelligent and funny, or your audience might laugh at you instead of what you’re saying.
Funny President Speech Intro
All the other candidates will come up here and tell you why you should vote for them. I am going to give you only one reason to vote for me. As President Donald Trump said, “People would vote for me because I’m so good looking.” That’s right, I’m the perfect candidate for Student Council President because my face is like an angel’s.
You’ll see my face every time I ask for your concerns, give a speech, or land an interview in the school paper. Consider who’s face you want to stare at every day, mine or theirs, if you want this year and school politics to be more enjoyable.
Hilarious Vice President Speech Opener
I want to be your Vice President, so you can start calling me Veep. That’s all there is to it, people. As I walk down the hallways at school, I want to feel like I’m in one of those YouTube videos for kids where a grown man drives tiny toy trucks. I’m veep!
Let’s veep! Whenever I’m waiting in line for lunch or using the restroom, Veep Veep! Whenever I raise my hand in class or make a speech, Veep Veep! If you plan to vote for me after this speech, let’s turn this audience into a crowded highway that feels like Friday at 5 p.m.! Let’s go! I’m veep!
Silly Secretary Speech Intro
There is no doubt that your Student Council Secretary needs to love words. Because I love words so much, I only eat Alpha-Bits for breakfast. Moreover, I’ll eat cereal letters only if they can be used to form words. If there are still “T,” “Q,” and “R” in the bowl, I can’t swallow them.
Because I can’t bring myself to use pencils, I fail every automatically graded exam because I can’t bring myself to damage them. Even though I’m only 16, I have the wrist of a 92-year-old secretary!
Comical Treasurer Speech Opener
My running for treasurer speech can be found here. Time is money, so we’re all going to become very wealthy after listening to this speech. I’m not sure who is responsible for the exchange rate, but I hope it’s good.
Since I’m Treasurer, I’ve designed my speech to maximize the amount of time we turn into money.
Humorous Intros for Any Student Council Speech
The most important tip for writing a speech is to speak on the level of your audience. Give your speech a dose of humor with a funny intro. Teenagers love fun and humor.
- We were told by Mr. Smith, our beloved math teacher, that we would one day use trigonometry. He’s an awesome teacher, and I really want him to be right. I will cover things that are opposite and adjacent to the school’s issues, so I will go off on a tangent.
- Student Council probably conjures up images of old, bald, white guys wearing suits and ties sitting around talking about all the problems students cause. Imagining myself as one of those guys will help me overcome my stage fright today. I’d prefer to be the one with the biggest gut, if you don’t mind.
- Today, I’m here to talk about something serious, and I’ve been trying to figure out how to get your vote. You might think school rules and student privileges are nacho business, but that’s not true. My goal isn’t to jalapeo business or to get saucy, and I won’t burrito around the subject. Vote for me for President if you want this year to feel like a fiesta. If you still haven’t figured it out, I’m the best woman for the job.
Relate With Humor
In order to win a high school election, you must be able to relate to your peers. You will capture their attention with a funny opening line or paragraph, which will have them thinking about you at the polls.